169+1

now, 169 days u have been away..
tomorrow it will be the last day of my thoughts about u..
and after that, i think i will have no missing to u anymore..
170.. it will be all ended and no more..
wounds.. injuries.. pains.. and sadness..
but frankly say, it has been so long that i have never thought of u..
since when the another he lived inside me..
so thank you that u able to go out from me..
without u.. i just found out my smile can be so beautiful..
my life can be still so good or even more better than it..
i was so glad that it was he..
the one who walked into my heart and healed me..
whom can really light up the darkness of my broken heart..
and make me feel the love once more again..
other than that, no whys..
i treasure it very much.. very very so much..
though i don know how long u and me.. the relationship can sustained..
or will u still wait and accept me after several years..
but now, i just know, u are with me, enough.
u belong to me..
even if the time was passing..
but u are still belong to me..
eternity.. is mine.. =)
u. the stupid. haha!

ps: when i look at u..
i can feel the happiness that i never ever feel to..
that's why i love to look at u so much! haha! bleh~

ahha!

aww.. i have seen the news that seriously earthquake and tsunami hit japan!
what a so shock and terribly horrible news.. so sad to know it..
ahha! many people have died and almost everyone of them has lost their homes..
i put my fingers crossed and prayed for them.. god bless them~ =）

hoho finally my countdown became one!
and tomorrow it will be turning to zero yay!
solou coming back SOON!! haha! =P
the same come back safe and healthy ahha!
and i gonna meet him tomorrow right after he came back!!
yea!!! eventually i can make it lol~
meet him on the first day he returning from the national service~
since i couldnt make it last time when he coming back at chinese new year~
so i am sososo expected to see him tomorrow! haha!
be careful my punch my beat and all lol! solou! =P
missing u. hehe~ ^^

believing..

yay~ he gotta back on next sun!
which means still have 6days left hehe~
finally my countdown number turns to single number haha!
i was so excited looking forwards for his returning~
but now i am thinking.. after he was coming back..
then it's my turn to go for national service jo..
haha.. donwan but have to wan it still..
it's so gloomy.. i donknow after few months when i heading back..
what would happen to u, me and everyone.. especially u..
i admit.. i always make things simple but i could think for so much..
sometime it was just too much.. over thinking and worrying..
before, when the number still in the bigbig number..
i so hoped it can be moved faster to the zero..
but then right now.. when facing the single number..
i started worrying.. the day is getting nearer and nearer..
the day that i need to tell him the real..
after the real what would happening..
i know.. i'll bring him the sadness for sure..
but that's what i don hope to see so..
i felt so sad for yesterday's thing..
though i don really know what words i have said
that made u felt so suspicious of me..
and doubted for the things i have said..
but..
believe me.. i wont lie! =)

solou!!! stay strong always!!!!!!!!!

miracle..

ho.. he chatted with me.. he did chat!
omg! my illusion!? unbelievable!? amazing!?
but then.. should i happy? should i feel grateful for that?
the feeling at that time was really indescribable..
in a very sudden.. twinkling light at the taskbar..
unexpected.. it was he.. the one who i thought had disappeared..
i have hesitated for a while before opening his chatbox..
he? i have doubted of it.. is that he?
is that really he who was finding me to chat?
why he finds me to chat? it came so suddenly..
i opened it.. i have thought it for so long.. hardly type a hi..
again.. unexpected.. he replied me so fast..
before that.. i felt wanna cry.. but i couldn't.. i can't..
just a very short pain inside me.. then nothing..
i know it was all passed.. and i think i should happy..
coz finally he made a decision to start a chat with me..
yet.. he still looked me as his friend.. but it's only perhaps..
anyway i hoped we can still at least chat with each other..
coz there's no more i wanted.. from u.. =)

bedtime!!

ho! again! so late havent go to bed! =o=
what has made me felt sleepless yet im now so jing shen lol~
just now i have seen his photos haha ya again seeing! =P
every photos of him will automatically make me have a natural expression~
look on his photo.. haha! solou look bintai look cute look all look also got!
some photo after i'd seen the first word came out from my mouth is.. solou! haha!
i just said it out so naturally and smiled in that so charming way lol!
but in between that one second.. i can turn a smile into a tear..
'lol what the hell is that?' are u all thinking like that?
ya! it's me.. stupid me! aww!~ miss him..